Hi Rowina,Must say I was touched by your letter! I agree with your last sentence and it reminded me of Eph. 4:30.
The Living Bible: "Do not cause the Holy Spirit sorrow by the way you live. Remember, he is the One who marks you to be present on that day when salvation from sin will be complete."King James Bible: "And grieve not the Holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption."
I too have been at the cross roads! My dad was a Meth. minister but my salvation came through a book by a Roman Catholic priest and monk, Thomas Merton, "Thoughts In Solitude". I stumbled across it in the library. It was severely rejected by my Dad, naturally, but God had the last word when a footnote appeared in his teachers manual from this book. God deals with each of us individually & wonderfully. I sincerely believe with all my heart we will soon see Him Face to Face to Thank, Love and Praise Him.
Nice to have this moment with you,Mary Anna