In
ancient times, the father selected a bride for his
son. It was the
father’s will, or desire. If the rapture
occurs in the month of Av, this would be especially
appropriate as
“Av” means father and derives from “will” or “desire”!
After
the bride was chosen, the son would go away and prepare a
house to live in with his new bride.
Shiddukhin
refers to the first step in the marriage process - the
arraignments preliminary to the legal betrothal.
It
was common in ancient Israel of the father of the groom
to select a bride for his son.
Biblical
Example of Shiddukhin -
Genesis
24:1-4
Notice
in this passage Abraham - makes arrangements for his son
Isaac's wedding. While the father usually had the
responsibility in Abraham's life it was not possible. It
was acceptable for the father to delegate this
responsibility by designating a representative - called a
shadkhan - marriage broker or matchmaker.
The
next phase of this step was the - Ketubah
Ketubah
means - "written" Written in Hebrew as -
hbtk.
The ketubah was and still is today the - "marriage
contract." The ketubah includes the provisions and
conditions of the proposed marriage:
The
Mohar - or Bridal Payment
This
is sometimes called the Bride price. It is a gift paid by
the groom to the bride's family - but ultimately belongs
to the bride. It changed her status and set her free from
her parent's household.
The
Mikveh - or Ritual Immersion
This
was prior to actually entering
into the formal betrothal period, and was symbolic of
spiritual cleansing. It was common for the bride
and groom to separately take a ritual immersion.
"The
Hebrew month of
Av (or Menachem-Av, the consoler of Av)
is the fifth of the twelve months of the Jewish calendar.
The
name
Av literally means "father." It derives from the
root which means "to will" or "to desire."
It
is the month of the "low point" of the Jewish calendar
(the 9th of
Av, the day of the sin of the spies and the
destruction of both the first and second Temples in
Jerusalem) as well as the month of the
"high point" of the Jewish calendar (the
15th of
Av--"there are no happier days for Israel
than the 15th of
Av
and
Yom HaKippurim" (Mishnah Ta'anit 26:)--the
day of finding one's predestined soul-mate)." The 15th
of Av in 2017 is August 6-7.
As
the betrothal includes the blessings of the wine under the
huppah, one of the last of Yeshua's actions was to bless
the cup of the New Covenant - the cup of the ketubah hbtk
- that contract of marriage. He too stated that He would
not tasted again until a later time, when he would drink
at the wedding feast. The image of our betrothal also
answers the question of whether believers can lose their
salvation. The Scripture points to the fact that we are
betrothed to the Messiah - we are in that engagement
period prior to the wedding:
·
As
in any betrothal - the promise is so sure of our wedding
that it would take a religious (get) divorce to nullify
the contract.
·
This
divorce (get) is only available to the husband.
·
This
too is promised by God in
Hosea
2:19-20 - He promises that He will
betrothal His people to Himself - forever. Would God ever
divorce His people - (Malachi
2:16) - certainly it is not in His
character to divorce.
·
The
lesson or implications are quite clear - we are secure in
our Messiah's contract with us - we cannot break it - and
He promises that He will not break it - (Jn. 10:28).
How
is Messiah fulfilling His betrothal obligations? What was
the duty of the bridegroom during the period of the
betrothal? To prepare a household for his bride to be. Is
this not what He (Yeshua) said He would be doing ?(Jn. 14:1-3).
He is fulfilling His part of the betrothal.
Where
is the Matan ntm - or bridal gift of love from Messiah -
if indeed we are His betrothed. Remember the word Matan
ntm means gift or pledge - in Greek the word is Charismata
- gift. In (Eph 1:13-14)
Paul tells us that this pledge or gift - is the Holy
Spirit - a promise of love and that He will return for us.
Interestingly this pledge was given at Shavuot (Pentecost)
-
Acts2:1-4.
Could He also be telling us not only of His love but just
how He is fulfilling (Jer 31:33)?
But
what of His bride - what is she to be doing? During this
one year period - the bride would consecrate herself - and
prepare holy garments for the upcoming marriage. Paul puts
this preparation in very clear terms - (Eph 5:25-27).
The bridegroom is making preparations to return for His
bride - we need to ask ourselves are we as His betrothed
keeping our garments clean? Are we arrayed in our bridal
attire, and keeping our ketubah hbtk - covenant promises
and vows?
The
final step in the wedding process is called - Nissuin -
the word commons from the Hebrew verb - hsn ( nasa) -
which means , "to carry." This is a graphic description -
as the bride would be waiting for her groom to come - to
carry her off to her new home. The period of the betrothal
- was a time of great anticipation - as the bride waited
for the arrival of her betrothed. One of the unique
features of the Biblical Jewish wedding was the time of
the groom's arrival - it was to be a surprise:
·
The
bride took the betrothal seriously - expecting the at the
end of the year long period of the betrothal.
·
She
knew the approximate timing - but the exact hour or day
was uncertain.
·
It
was the father of the groom who would give the final
approval for the marriage to begin.
The
coming of the Bridegroom and the Wedding Begins
Since
the time of his arrival was a surprise - the bride and her
bridal party were always to be ready - this is the
background of Yeshua's parable (Mat.
25:1-13). It was customary for one of the
grooms party to go ahead of the bridegroom, leading the
way to the bride's house - and shout - "Behold, the
bridegroom comes." This would be followed by the sounding
of the shofar. At the sounding of the shofar the entire
wedding processional would go through the streets of the
city to the bride's house.
Sources:
various including
http://messianicfellowship.50webs.com/wedding.html
YBIC
Bruce
Baber