http://www.fivedoves.com/letters/sep2011/tracyc929.htm
Tracy, I read your post and your experience with your family, house and possessions are similar to what I have gone through.    What is happening is that your husband is not really watching for the rapture and is not saved.   You want to believe that you both are watching for the rapture and you love him so much, but really he is just trying to please you.   He is sitting on the fence of his salvation and wants God and all the goodness associated with having a Godly wife....you know the benefits of God not abandoning him, to keep blessing him financially, etc.   But the problem is I think that when things go wrong, that he blames you because you were supposed to be close to God and so then he thinks that you really don't know God and all this rapture business is a hoax.   So then if you can't seem to get it together with your career, finances, etc. and every rapture date is coming and going, then in his carnal mind he is thinking that you are using God as a crutch because you cannot handle any problems and are financially dependent.    The devil probably plays with his mind that he should have found another woman and then goes through his sad little list of what he wanted in a woman.   He sounds very angry at God for not granting his wishes like a genie.   Well, God is not a genie and He does not sit in the sky like a Santa Claus either.  I mean people who are in hip-hop and get to the top of the Forbes list, they have to call on an evil spirit who does grant their wish like a genie.   However, there is a catch for this, they have to promote something for the devil such as a false religion or perverseness.  Many people want to play both sides without getting burned and it just does not work that way anymore.   The age of grace is about over and we are seeing a transition.   God is not playing around with the birds falling out of the sky, the earthquakes, etc.      A lot of carnal minded think that Christians who have too much money should give it away to charity and feed the homeless because that is the Christian thing to do.   And then they flip to the other side and think that if you are a Christian, that everything should be hunky dory in your life and you shouldn't have any problems.    This is the curse of the prosperity gospel.    This is why I shut off my television!   No temptation to see that this reality tv person is making $55 million a year on their clothing collection.   These people are just being used by the devil for maybe another year in order to get people so dependent on beautiful things that they are willing to take the mark of the beast.   

Your husband's problem is not you, it is his view of Christianity which is much like my husbands.   My husband lived in Hollywood and various parts of the really nice parts of Los Angeles and so he has a skewed version of life.   He went to the Orthodox church and his priest was very wealthy.   And his sisters are always talking about shopping at Neiman Marcus, etc.   But when tragedy strikes such as law suits, illness and death, they do not know how to handle it and they become VERY HATEFUL, bitter and lash out.  

What I think that you should do is take all of these painful experiences and write a book for those who are about to be left behind and subject to the mark of the beast.   Obviously you are feeling the weight of pain that rejecting the mark is going to bring.   You see, people left behind who reject the mark will see their spouses, children, parents, etc. take the mark and they will have to leave behind their baby books, cd collections, money, cars, houses, etc.   I believe you are going through an event of foreshadowing the mark.   Don't let this lesson be a wasted opportunity for the kingdom of God.   If you can even go to a church and give your testimony and give an altar call, you know that there is another woman like you in the church waiting to run to Jesus and probably too ashamed to say anything.

As far as your husband, if he is physically abusing you then I hope that you would have called the police and got a restraining order against him.   There would be no reason for you to leave.   That is absolutely ridiculous that if you are the victim, that you are being victimized again.     If he is verbally abusive, then I can relate because I have had to learn how to deal with that with my husband.   You see that I have thrown my wedding ring across the room many times.   And he always says hateful things and I have had to learn how to use my "wits" to come back at him to penetrate his soul with repentance like a knife so that he knows he has messed up, yet I do not come back hatefully and sink to his level.   I am only in my 30's, and I remember it took my grandmother to her 50's to learn this.   

As far as I can see if you are physically abused you would have taken your daughters.   If it was verbal, then I think that the devil has played on your self esteem so bad that you do not have the ability to fight anymore.   And that is exactly where the devil wants to keep you.   A woman puts a lot of value into the way she keeps house, how well her children do in school, etc.   And those things have been taken from you.     You are valuable to the Lord and you are teaching your daughters to not stand up for themselves?    Where are these girls?   With this abusive man?   NO!   Go back and demand that this stop.   You are not going to put up with this evil ANYMORE!     This man needs to see that God is stronger than his abuse!   And whatever is causing him to be abusive, then it has GOT TO GO if he wants to have a relationship with these girls.   Is it porn, gambling, money, alcohol?   What I see is this man has sunny days and then dark cloudy days and that is an indicator there could be an addiction.  

Anyways I am not trying to tell you what to do, I am not there.    But I will pray for you and I pray God will give you clear direction.    I hope that you will see yourself in a new light while away from this situation and enjoy it.   Maybe this is a temporary change, or possibly permanent.   But definitely blossom where you are planted.   You know it took a move to Los Angeles for me to feel the freedom to change my appearance, my tastes in things, and try new things, and also hang out with people I would have never considered before.   Maybe it is hot and muggy there where you are, but possibly you could get a great tan!  Ha Ha!   I remember that my mother's friend visited a part of Canada before and she said that she felt the Lord in a new light being with such vastly different people.   You are being stretched right now for strength because there are people who will need to learn from you when they are suffering torture for Jesus in the tribulation.   They will want to know that it is worth it.