Patty,
I have never posted here on doves before but I read the posts as best I can from day to day.  Although I have not posted I do pray for those requesting prayers.  Your situation with your father really spoke to my heart, and I want to share with you what I did for my own father who was much like yours.  He passed away in 1988 a year before my only son was born.  My dad too, was stubborn and spiteful, and not with the Lord at all.  He also would laugh at our distresses and difficulties, and I just could never understand.   Of course I never felt very close to him, but I did spend time with him, and loved him very much in spite of himself.  The last 4 years of his life were in and out of the hospital and long bouts of illnesses but he remained spiteful.  At the end I visited often, prayed a lot, and would sit for hours hoping to hear him tell me just one time "he loved me", it never happened unfortunately.  But each time I left his side I told him how much I loved him and kissed him good-bye.  The night he passed the Lord spared me from a very difficult night at the hospital.  Most of my siblings kept their distance from him, probably for their own preservation.  However, I remained, but I also "let-go and let-GOD" lead me through those days with my dad and I am eternally grateful to GOD for my time with him.  I am at peace in my heart that I did all that I could possibly do and the ultimate choice was his, but I never stopped praying for him.  Sometimes, as much as it truly breaks our heart that the one we love doesn't know the Lord, we have to turn it over to the Lord and he will guide you and give you peace.
 
 
May God be with you through this most difficult and painful time.  God Bless...
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Welcome to the Doves, Wendy!
John