Dear Doves,

Any connection between Shiva the god of destruction and sitting sheva(seven days) after the death of a loved one is like connecting sure and sewer. They sound a little alike but come from different words and have NO connection. 

 

The practice of sitting sheva allows a community to pay respects, offer comfort to the family of one who has died and been buried.  In pre-modern times news spread by word of mouth and one learned of a friend's passing after the burial, so could not give condolences then. Sheva allowed for the family to remain together and accept callers for a week after the funeral, without the expectation of the family returning to their regular responsibilities of work, etc. 

In Jewish thought the death is a celebration of the memory of one's life, not an occasion for the despair of those who do not know hope.  For this reason, those who follow Torah were not to cut themselves for grief, nor shave their heads, nor tear their garments as the heathen did.  We also are to trust the Creator in all his ways that his judgments are true and righteous altogether (Psalm 19:9).  We may mourn our loss, but we do not wail as those without hope.

Hope this helps clarify the matter a little.

Shalom,

Betty Winkelman