I can now so clearly see why you have hoped to leave "the world" as
soon as possible.  Terrible memories and dreams you have of that
violation of your family in the Walmart parking lot a couple of years
ago.

I too have some bad memories which make me ask the Lord to please
deliver me from these, either here or through taking me to Heaven.

Most of my memories are not as physically violent as yours; they are
memories of violence to my soul and my son's soul.

But I do have one memory of similar violence, of my first husband's
murder.  I was not there, only heard about it, but I found it necessary
and helpful to go to a grief group at a church.  Michael and I had been
divorced quite a few years when this happened, but it still affected
me, and still haunts me.

Michael was murdered by a man who wanted to "take his identity".  Shot
in the back of the head in a lonely place in Oklahoma where he had been
lured.  It took three years go find the "con man", who claimed as his
defense to be a government agent, who shot Michael when he did not know
a "password".

Michael might have been able to help me with our son, had he lived,
perhaps helped him to have faith in God, which he does not have.  So
many might have's....

Praying for your safety on this trip to New York for surgery, and for
the girls' safety while you are gone.

God bless this family, together or apart, and heal Tracy's memories and
fears.  And keep the bad guys far away.

Mariel