T.O. (5 Oct 2011)
"To Charles, re:   "Just hanging on""


 
Hi Charles,

It takes a really strong person to hang on the way you and many others do !

I would just like to tell you that besides this website, I have no other Christian fellowship at all.  The few Christians I speak to occasionally don't seem to be expecting Jesus' return or talk about it.  It is like Christianity is more of a social "comfort" but I don't see or feel any spiritual depth from people.

You are not alone in this though.  Please know that and please know I'll be praying for you. 
I have often felt just like you are describing too and then God renews something in me when I least expect it.
Just a reminder, we can always meet Him in His Presence in prayer, meditating on His word and I particularly love to pray just before falling asleep, that He speak with me and instruct me during my dreams. 
I went from a severe insomniac to a deep dreamer, and the dreams are so deep in meaning that I look forward to falling asleep to learn more.  All of this while I desperately await His return.  I actually enjoy reflecting on my dreams and Bible study throughout the day, on a "day-by-day" basis...
I often feel the Lord's invitation to step into His presence throughout the day and through His spirit I feel that supernatural connection and often it's hard to snap out of it and attend to earthly matters.. LOL

This all started when I felt like there was nothing  to look forward to on this earth and my physical strength ran out !! Scary helpless feeling !!  I felt job and finances slipping away and I could not fight it, I too was tired, drained, overwhelmed from all that you described in your letter. 

Now I plan my day choosing to step into His presence which He calls His secret place any time or all the time, and I have transferred my finances and matters to be dealt with to His Kingdom, and this relationship has made things manageable in ways beyond my own comprehension. 
I have asked the Lord to kindly share His thoughts with me too and show me things that will occupy me, excite and intrigue me... He knows what makes me tick. So while I wait for Him here and now I have asked Him to make me a part of His days in the sense that I want, need and look forward to the daily communication through thoughts, prayers and dreams.
I particularly ask about intriguing archeological mysteries.  I let Him know that whatever He feels I can handle in knowledge and discoveries, I "desire" to learn and know and bypass some educational theories, etc.  All through His guidance.
In other words, I have begged to please keep me distracted with His heavenly matters from above while I'm still living here.

I hope you enjoyed reading about my personal little adventure while riding out this waiting.

Please keep sharing your thoughts and feelings on this site as you will grow even stronger in Him !!  We are all together in this.

YSIC,
T. O.