I am truly sorry to hear you are confused by the
concept of the outer darkness. As you state by your
comments, it is not a place for the faithful believer in
Jesus' salvation and is nothing a faithful believer
need be worried about. The above links may shed some
helpful light on the topic.
Remember that the outer darkness is not hell, but
instead is a place of regret and remorse, lasting for a
short or longer time, because of a judgment being rendered
against the believer. Believers who are judged unfaithful
will be excluded from the wedding, but will still reside
in heaven with other believers, just not as a part of the
wedding itself as the Bride. It all comes down to Christ's
judgment at the Judgment Seat of Christ of the believer's
faithfulness as shown by his/her works after being saved.
The outer darkness is meant
for Christians, who are unfaithful spiritually
to their belief in God. You may want to read more about
this topic in the above links. They provides
arguments both for and against the so-called kingdom
exclusion doctrine, that is, a belief that believers
can be excluded from the kingdom of God
by unfaithfulness, i.e., through lack of works.
Their behavior is self-centered and inconsistent
with Christ's commandments to love God and our fellow
man,i.e., to take up our cross and bear with the suffering
associated with being known as a believer in Jesus and the
salvation He offers. Believers who do not praise God and
His Son, do not want to help their fellow man, and are not
interested in watching and waiting for Christ's
return will probably be judged unfaithful.
Your message indicates you have a strong faith in
your salvation alone, and I assume your modesty led
you to omit any mention of works performed for the Lord,
through belief in Christ's finished work at Calvary. If
your faith is true and strong, you will have been filled
with the Holy Sprit to perform kind works for people, such
as charitable gifts to feed the hungry and provide shelter
for the homeless, and to spread the gospel to those who
are unsaved. If you have done things such as these you
will probably be judged faithful and will therefore
have nothing to worry about concerning the outer darkness.
I pray that you have not been unnecessarily alarmed
by my messages and I hope these words help you
understand a little better. I am certainly not an expert
and am trying to point you in the direction for obtaining
a better understanding through links to articles,
such as those above, that were helpful to me
Please let us all know where your further study on
this topic leads you. I pray that the Holy Spirit will
shed more light on this topic for you, me and everyone
else on this site and elsewhere..
Neither you nor I can judge whether your life has
demonstrated a level of faithfulness after salvation to
merit inclusion in the kingdom of God.