Hi All Doves,
Today is Friday 7/29. I am curious to know if anyone else felt this today....
All I could do today was cry - gut wrenching crying for the Lord Almighty. I can't really explain as there are no words. My longing to be with My Father and Jesus is just so GREAT that all I could do today was cry and cry and shake. The shakiness I think is the holy fear of the Lord and the pure understanding of His Holiness and my smallness and nothingness apart from Jesus.
I am also so grieved that no one I know wants to hear what is being proclaimed from the rooftops. Friends and family think I am nuts. I pretty much have lost interest in all things here; as you know, nothing satisfies. Our only hope is in Jesus and what is to come. I have been sending out emails and passing things along to anyone on my email list with [NOW] no fear of what is thought of me. Only one brother in the Lord acknowledged receipt of anything I've sent out. Pretty much everyone else has ignored everything, or perhaps have even blocked my emails.
I know a lot of you are feeling excited beyond words, feeling great joy, but what I mostly feel, interspersed with some peace when worshiping, is brokenness, contriteness and weeping that is so big I can't really describe. I don't think it's just for myself, but for the world and all those who are lost, and for what is coming. And yes, I have confessed and repented of all my sins and I am covered in Jesus' Blood....His finished work on the cross is SO BIG AND SO AMAZING that I feel I cannot thank Him enough. I am not depressed, nor fearful nor anxious - none of that. But I can't stop crying.
Lately the word "grace" keeps coming to mind and I am blown away beyond words again at what God's grace really means - almost beyond comprehension. This song by Phil Keaggy "Under The Grace" makes me bawl every time, but the one phrase especially:
And the hungry in heart seeks for its place and a home
But it may tear you apart when you see
What this grace here has done
Listen to it and view the words on YouTube here:
If anyone can share what the Lord is doing with them along these lines, I would really appreciate it.
God Bless You All,