Subject: You Know You Are In Texas When:
~ The birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.
~ The trees are whistling for the dogs.
~ The best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
~ Hot water now comes out of both taps.
~ You can make sun tea instantly.
~ You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.
~ The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a little chilly.
~ You discover that in July it only takes 2 fingers to steer your car.
~ You discover you can get sunburned through your car window.
~ You actually burn your hand opening the car door.
~ You break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m.
~ Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?"
~ You realize that asphalt has a liquid state.
~ The potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out and add butter, salt and pepper.
~ Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying boiled eggs.
~ The cows are giving evaporated milk.
............Ah, what a place to call home.
 
til that time,
t