Bob D
(16 Jan 2009)
"The Healing of Godly Grief"
The Healing of Godly Grief
I
really did not want to write an article about this subject but the Holy
Spirit kept tugging inside of me explaining that there are many people
needing to hear this message, including myself. In other words people
are hurting on the inside and they do not really know what to do with
their pain.
Did you ever just look at a relationship or
the world and get so vexed in your heart at what you see? If it hits
our sour spot we can really start to take it personal. Deep down it is
just not in us to accept what we our looking at or experiencing because
it goes against who we are (what we stand for).
Then
comes the enduring process as we grieve,usually a loss of some kind.
The development of grief does not have to be a death in the family. It
could be looking at the world or maybe some kind of rejection or
betrayal. We could be witnessing an injustice being done to someone
else. Perhaps a sickness but people respond different based on their
personalities. I would like to talk about the root, not the symptom.
There
are different degrees of hurt but we can grieve in a Godly constructive
way. This is a privilege that very few people ever have the luxury of
going through. Worldly grief leads to misery. Godly grief leads to
healing. Emotions such as fear,anxiety,preoccupation and stress most of
the time are a cover up for where God wants to bring us in our
hearts....a place of healing through His Son Jesus Christ.
I
am going to convey some points to you and I am confident that God is
going to touch your heart. I have to confess that as I was growing up I
had nothing but misconceptions about grief. Not all of this was my
fault because the world barraged me with a lot of ideas that were not
of God.
Let me just say some things about Godly grief
that may shed some light on the subject. I think there is a sense of
repentance in Godly grief, whether we did wrong or an injustice was
done to us.
We cannot really go into this spiritual
realm of Godly grief ourselves. God has to bring us to this
point,usually through our willingness to go. Sometimes Godly grief just
comes upon us and our will. In this case we do not have a whole lot to
do with the process.
I think the worldly process keeps us
from Godly grief because it is so superficial. The real us (the hurt
inside of us that God desires to bring out) will usually be
suppressed.The world places an emphasis on the outside.Many people are
hurting on the inside.
When we are wronged in one way or
another, usually we become very shortsighted and emphasize our
hurt.Some people will say, "That time is the greatest healer" but I
believe that is more of a cliché than a biblical truth.Time may blunt
some of the hurt in us but always remember the Holy Spirit is the
greatest healer. John 14:16 says "I will pray the Father and He shall
give you another Comforter,that He may abide with you forever."
God
created time. The Holy Spirit heals,comforts and reassures us through
Jesus Christ. At this point sometimes in our hurt we will look for
somebody to rescue us but that role and title belongs to Jesus
Christ.Is.61:1,2. This verse says, "The Spirit of the Lord God is upon
me: because the Lord hath anointed me to preach good tidings unto the
meek; he hath sent me to bind up the broken hearted, to proclaim
liberty to the captive, and the opening of the prison to them that are
bound; (2) To proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord, and the day of
vengeance of our God; to comfort all that mourn." This verse is talking
about Jesus Christ.
When He rescues us,He comforts us in
our mourning. We cannot rescue somebody in their hurt nor can a person
save us. We can love,empathize,counsel and offer a helping hand but
Jesus Christ rescues people through salvation in Him because He will be
the one getting the glory forever and ever, not us.John
3:16,Dan.7:14,Rev.15:4. Ultimately, only God can reach someone's heart
(hurt).
Remember through this whole process of broken
emotions God is building something special into our lives even through
our pain. Maybe I should say especially through our hurt.
As
children of God, just because we don't feel this process does not mean
it is not happening. "Being confident of this very thing, that he which
hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus
Christ." Phil 1:6.
I will even go one step further. God is
going to be building something special into our hearts for all
eternity. Joy unspeakable and full of glory will be in heaven. Jesus
Christ will heal our painful emotions. Everybody will treat everyone in
a proper manner and we will be at peace.
If we get frustrated enough with our deep seated hurts, sometimes we will sweep the dirt under the rug.
Our
anxiety and fear will cover up emotions against the core of who we
really are in Jesus Christ. Letting the Holy Spirit deal with our pain
in His way and His time will give us supernatural and Godly peace which
surpasses all understanding.(6) "Be careful for nothing; but in
everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your
requests be made known unto God. (7) And the peace of God, which
passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through
Christ Jesus." Phil 4:6-7.
If we decide to go to the
person or group that hurt us (if this is even possible) realize that
he, she or the group may have a cold heart and will not be able to
sympathize or emphasize with our pain. If no empathy is given, internal
frustration will usually set inside.
God wants us to
turn to Him in our pain. Remember Hebrews 4:14-16 says we can come
boldly unto the throne of grace because Jesus can relate to our
struggles in life. If we have accepted Jesus Christ as our personal
Savior the Holy Spirit came to live inside of us. When we allow the
Holy Spirit to fill us, our hurt will be absorbed in the person of
Jesus Christ. Worrying is counterproductive. This emotion will get us
nowhere.
There is a proverb that says a point comes when
the heart is so broken that it is beyond repair. As Christians we have
the Holy Spirit living inside of us. God heals us in the midst of our
broken and damaged lives. I almost want to say this is what God does
best but the truth of the matter is God is perfect in everything. God
works everything out for good for all those that love Him and are
called according to His purpose. Romans 8:28.
I believe
this is the most important principle that I am about to mention. I hear
this all the time. Someone will say to somebody else, "You have to
change." Here is the problem with that premise, especially in the midst
of our hurts. We cannot change. We can only submit (to good or bad).
God changes us through His Son Jesus Christ. "Therefore if any man be
in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold,
all things are become new." 2nd Cor.5:17. This verse describes God
changing an individual through His Son Jesus Christ. If we submit to
God through His Son Jesus Christ He will change us, but only God can do
this.
The presence of the Holy Spirit comforts us in our
Savior Jesus Christ. Be patient in this changing process through our
submission to God. I suppose it can happen overnight but not very
often. Salvation in Jesus Christ takes place at the moment an
individual comes to the foot of the cross and accepts the Savior for
the remission of his or her sins who is Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ
heals through the power of the Holy Spirit. We were made for closure
with God, ourselves and other people.
For those of
you that are going through a trial, sometimes just when one episode
ends, another one starts. God desires to grant us a release through
Jesus Christ. If you have read any of my articles, you know my position
on how close we are to the rapture of the Church. As I sit here writing
this paper I can almost feel the joy of the resurrection now!
One
person said the drudgery of our trials will be gone but the experience
of our trials will still be present in heaven. In my opinion this is
something to think about. We are going to have the privilege of
grieving over love ones,missed opportunities and other issues that
Jesus is going to bring to our mind and heart.
What is
happening on the inside is far more important than what is taking place
on the outside. I know the human part of us becomes overwhelmed;
however,God desires that quality of rest for our souls through the
empowering work of the Holy Spirit. I personally believe asking God to
take us to this righteous grieving process is good because the
supernatural peace of God will abide in us.
In 1st Peter
1:6-8 the Holy Spirit is talking about intense trials,sufferings and
temptations and then Peter says, "Ye rejoice with joy unspeakable and
full of glory." As Christians, regardless as to what we are going
through, we are destined for "Joy unspeakable and full of glory." 1st
Peter 1:8.
The Bible says in John 11:35 "Jesus wept."
That tells me something. Our Savior knows how to grieve. Many people
see Jesus Christ as distant and cold but the Bible says, "He that
loveth not knoweth not God; God is love." 1st John 4:8.
Jesus
said "Blessed are the poor in spirit for theirs is the kingdom of
heaven." Matt 5:3. The principle here is that God is Holy and we are
sinful. He is all and we are nothing (yet God makes us feel special in
His Son Jesus Christ). I would think a contrite spirit always wanting
the grace of God is what Jesus is trying to convey. The second
beatitude is "Blessed are they that mourn for they shall be
comforted."Matt 5:4.
I believe the primary reason we are
to mourn or grieve is because of the first beatitude.... being poor in
spirit. Grief over being poor in spirit will lead to God's comfort.
People
need a sense of closure in the midst of their pain and this will not
happen apart from God. We are certainly not going to find it in the
world. Jesus Christ gives us closure in Him.
There is a
verse in the last book of the Bible. "And God shall wipe away all tears
from their eyes; and there shall be no more death,neither sorrow,nor
crying,neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are
passed away." Rev 21:4. The context of this verse is at the end of the
one thousand year reign of Jesus Christ.
It is in the
character of God to comfort His people. He is a merciful God. 2nd These
2:16 says, "Now our Lord Jesus Christ himself,and God, even our
Father, which hath loved us, and hath given us everlasting consolation
and good hope through grace." This is His nature. He is ... "The Father
of mercies,and the God of all comfort." 2nd Cor 1:3.
In
heaven we will be able to meet redeemed saints throughout history that
went through the same overwhelming situations that we experienced. The
circumstances will disappear but the relationship with Jesus Christ
will last forever.
It is good to accept the Lord Jesus
Christ into your heart as your personal Savior if you have not already
made this all important eternal decision.To properly grieve through a
problem takes the God of all comfort working through us. Otherwise it
is just an exercise in futility.
For a person to try and
deal with this on their own without God will lead to misery. Choose
healing in Jesus Christ as we seek the God of all comfort until Jesus
Christ calls us home in the rapture. That will be soon. Perhaps
today/tonight!
Love in Christ,
Bob D