Wes W (29 Dec 2010)

It’s depressing - what is out there in Christendom. Of course we all knew that anyway. Prophecies of the Glory of God coming and then prophecies of a “spiritual famine” - nothing less than contradictory to me. I felt dry for several weeks again and to my distress I have had more than one close friend inform me that they no longer believe in Jesus - calling a myth and a hoax. My best friend whom I named my own son after and who was quite well known in the Jesus movement for the glory that he was covered in at the time - he is one. Perplexing!!!??? - These I, for so long, looked up to as well as others, and now - what is all this? I had felt like God was not moving and have felt that way for several weeks again - we all know how that is, but then it was like I had my focus turned to see that God was really at work - I saw a bubble as you see when they start to pop and the membrane so disintegrates and disbands that it seems only held together by strings in the last few moments before it bursts - well - this was the way I was seeing the faith of many right now as God is removing the false faiths and false structures and false assumptions and anticipations we have carried. As I have witnessed this now in my friends and have seen that their response to this was a renunciation of their faith - and the fact that I could now see more clearly that the same process seemed to be going on in myself - I was concerned and careful to be humbled in this and to hope my faith would not take the same hit. In short - I have had to tell myself that if God removes all my understanding I have had of my faith - I would still believe in him. I do see things I thought were more stable - just disintegrating within me - those frail false structures that I had built or just “bought” from someone else. It is a grievous time to see some depart from their confessions of faith and what rings the loudest to me now is, “If they deny me before men, I shall deny them before my Father”. God grant us the strength to remain in Christ.