Luke 12
        12:1 In the mean time, when there were gathered together an
innumerable multitude of people, insomuch that they trode one upon another,
he began to say unto his disciples first of all, Beware ye of the leaven of
the Pharisees, which is hypocrisy.
        12:2 For there is nothing covered, that shall not be revealed;
neither hid, that shall not be known.
        12:3 Therefore * * whatsoever ye have spoken in darkness shall be
heard in the light; and that which ye have spoken in the ear in closets
shall be proclaimed upon the housetops.
        12:4 And I say unto you my friends, Be not afraid of them that kill
the body, and after that have no * * more that they can do.
        12:5 But I will forewarn you whom ye shall fear: Fear him, which
after he hath killed hath power to cast into hell; yea, I say unto you, Fear
him.
      Mt 5:20
      For I say unto you, That except your righteousness shall exceed * the
righteousness of the scribes and Pharisees, ye shall in no case enter into
the kingdom of heaven.
 

      http://www.denverpost.com/search/ci_4817067
      Pastor resigns over homosexuality
      By Eric Gorski
      Denver Post Staff Writer
      DenverPost.com
 

In a tearful videotaped message Sunday to his congregation, the senior
pastor of a thriving evangelical megachurch in south metro Denver confessed
to sexual relations with other men and announced he had voluntarily resigned
his pulpit.

A month ago, the Rev. Paul Barnes of Grace Chapel in Doug las County
preached to his 2,100-member congregation about integrity and grace in the
aftermath of the Ted Haggard drugs-and-gay-sex scandal.

Now, the 54-year-old Barnes joins Haggard as a fallen evangelical minister
who preached that homosexuality was a sin but grappled with a hidden life.

"I have struggled with homosexuality since I was a 5-year-old boy," Barnes
said in the 32- minute video, which church leaders permitted The Denver Post
to view. "... I can't tell you the number of nights I have cried myself to
sleep, begging God to take this away."

His wife, Char, cradled his hand. Barnes declined an interview request
through the church.

Unlike Haggard, who had the ear of the White House, Barnes is not a
household name. He is a self-described introvert who avoids politics,
preferring to talk about a Gen-X service at the nondenominational church he
started 28 years ago in his basement, church officials said.

Barnes and Grace Chapel stayed out of the debate over Amendment 43, a
measure approved by Colorado voters last month defining marriage as between
one man and one woman.

"I can't think of a single sermon where he ever had a political agenda,"
said Dave Palmer, an associate pastor.

Palmer said the church got an anonymous call last week from a person
concerned for the welfare of Barnes and the church. The caller had overheard
a conversation in which someone mentioned "blowing the whistle" on
evangelical preachers engaged in homosexuality, including Barnes, Palmer
said.

Palmer met with Barnes, who confessed. At an emergency meeting Thursday, a
board of elders accepted Barnes' resignation after he admitted "sexual
infidelity," violating the church's code of conduct. Church leaders also
must affirm annually that they are "living the moral and ethical teachings
of Scripture in my public and private life."

Asked for details of Barnes' transgressions, Palmer called them "infrequent
events in his life" that to his knowledge did not take place in recent
months.

Sitting cross-legged in jeans and an open-collar shirt, Barnes spoke in his
video about evolving feelings growing up in a firm moral family: from
confused little boy to adolescent racked with self-loathing and guilt.

In their only talk about sex, Barnes said his father took him on a drive and
talked about what he would do if a "fag" approached him.

Barnes thought, "'Is that how you'd feel about me?' It was like a knife in
my heart, and it made me feel even more closed."

When Barnes experienced a Christian conversion at 17, it gave him a glimmer
of hope. But his homosexual feelings never went away, he said. He said he
cannot accept that a person is "born that way," so he looks to childhood
influences.

Barnes said he asked God many times why he was called to ministry, to start
Grace Chapel, carrying a "horrible burden."

The soft-spoken Barnes is an unlikely big-church pastor.

After graduating from Dallas Theological Seminary, Barnes and his wife moved
to Denver and began a Bible study. His church met in a school and a
mortuary, bought property at Colorado Boulevard and Arapahoe Road, and now
occupies a campus off County Line Road that used to be a car dealership.

Barnes described struggling with what he believes is the biblical teaching
that homosexuality is an abomination. Over the years, he grew to accept that
"this is my thorn in the flesh."

Barnes expressed hope for a future where one can "be who you are" and be
accepted and loved in the Christian community and also spoke about
"separating some of the teachings from Scripture" from Jesus Christ.

Palmer said he wasn't sure what Barnes meant, but Barnes told him that he
believes God views homosexuality as a sin.

Barnes said he has been in counseling three times and never found anyone he
could talk to.

His wife said on the video that she didn't know about her husband's
struggles until he confided in her last week. The couple has two daughters
in their 20s.

Char Barnes said she feels "like I'm living someone else's life" but was
grateful her husband revealed himself. The couple said they hope to stay in
Denver. Near the tape's end, Paul Barnes says, "This is what it is, it's
right, and it's time."

Church elder Russ Pilcher said the reaction at services Sunday was largely
concern for the couple. "I thought, 'Where did I fall short in making myself
so unapproachable that he couldn't come to me?"' Pilcher said.

Paul and Char Barnes will get counseling, but unlike Haggard, they will not
go into seclusion or report to a board of reconcilers, Palmer said. He said
it will be more personal and that church members will play a role.

Associate pastor John Zivojinovic is the interim senior pastor, and choosing
a successor is still months away, Pilcher said.

Given the Haggard story, Pal mer was asked whether Barnes' fall from grace
would expose the evangelical community to further charges of hypocrisy.

"The criticism is valid if you look at perfection being the mark, because
the next person who stands at our pulpit is going to be guilty of not being
perfect as well," he said. "Does that mean we have to change what we say
about the word of God? We can't do that."

Staff writer Eric Gorski can be reached at 303-954-1698 or
egorski@denverpost.com.