Monkey Business
 

Three monkeys sat in a coconut tree,
Discussing things as they're said to be.
Said one to the others, "Now listen, you two,
There's a certain rumor that can't be true -
That man descended from our noble race.
Why, the very idea is a terrible disgrace!
"No monkey ever deserted his wife,
Starved her babies and ruined her life.
And you've never known a mother monk
To leave her babies with others to bunk,
Or pass them on from one to another,
Till they scarcely know who is their mother.
"And another thing you'll never see -
A monk build a fence 'round a coconut tree,
Letting all the coconuts go to waste,
Forbidding all others to take a taste.
Why, if I put a fence around a tree,
Starvation would force you to steal from me.
"There's another thing a monk won't do -
Go out at night and get in a stew;
Or use a club or gun or knife
To take another old monkey's life.
Yes, man descended, the ornery cuss,
But, brother, he didn't descend from us!"
 

 . . . By an Unknown Author